From our weekly reflections

My biggest prayer for the year is for serenity. The United Methodist church down the road threw a party on Saturday, and we stopped by. It was like Eucharist with hot dogs and grape soda. Front porches are like the best thing ever. Had a great conversation with Ms. Joyce about Peter's faith. Bernard came over for a bit on Saturday night and told us that friendship is about justice, humility and freedom. Not sure yet what that means. We hold on to our emotions because they are how we experience the world. So respecting people's emotions is really important. 

Steve and I usually ride to work together and have a blast. Conversations with roommates, neighbors, etc. are constantly challenging my perceptions of God. The biggest thing in my life right now is the color red. The red leaves mean a change in season, which fills me with a feeling of anticipation. The first two or three weeks were hard. Not knowing or being known by anyone here and not having access to the people who did know me was frustrating. Ms. Bridgett's phone is off/dead/lost and I miss her. Miss Annie got onto me for walking outside without a sweater and Queen laid into me for not drying my hair. One, they were right, and two, I'm thankful for adopted mommas. I have experienced joy, frustration, silliness, brokenness, and deep love in those friendships. Got to spend Thanksgiving with Ms. Bridgette and her family. Thankful that she invited me! I was about to add a note apologizing for how jumbled my thoughts are, but then I decided I like that they're jumbled because that's where I am right now and I trust the Spirit's work in my heart. 

Randomly ran into Whitney after work at the train station. Been super tired because I haven't been able to sleep. The questions are rich, if unsettling. Sanchez and I are going to audition for American Idol together with "Somewhere Over the Rainbow." Someone told me white people call chit'lins "crinkle steaks." I almost fell out of my chair! Spent a million hours in the kitchen kneading dough for bread and dough for cookies and meat for this Syrian dish and making rice and green beans too. God was just as present in the cooking as in the actual dinner! So if I can learn how to love well somewhere, in some context, I am fighting injustice there and fighting it in all the places I will ever go, because I will always carry my being-redeemed heart with me. 

Also, God talks to me a lot in pictures. And sometimes through short sentences so I can remember them. Sitting at Pittman Park and belting "Be Thou My Vision" because no one was around. Like, my crap sucks but people still love me. I swear I can make friends with anyone by mentioning chit'lins. Went to a neighbor's 7th birthday party! It was super awkward because I don't know them that well and I hate parties (but really). Ryan and I taught preschool Sunday School on Easter and ROCKED IT. I think, maybe, what a flower feels is a sinking, pressing in to the soil and a stretching, reaching out into the world, toward the sun, never arriving. And I do feel like I'm there. 

Jill and I became friends with this like 90-year-old woman who loved to dance but didn't really know any dance moves so she just copied us. She told us that she LOVED to PARTY! It feels like the past eight and a half months of awkward moments are finally paying off... in the form of differently awkward moments. Asking not so much "who is right" but "how do we show each other love" and "where do we go from here." Gym, pool, nose piercing. Now I feel sore, sunburned, have a sore nose, and feel rested and more at peace. I'm going to miss our front porch. Because honestly? I can continue to carry a lot of prejudices and live with a lot of blind spots if I never explore faith with other people... people who are different from me.